Marriage | family prayer | family life
Spring is my favorite season of the year. After a long, cold winter, I appreciate every warm ray of sunshine so much more! I love watching buds appear on the trees, wearing floral dresses, and celebrating Jesus’ Resurrection at Easter. I’m also a big fan of spring cleaning.
Junk has accumulated in certain places in my home throughout the last few months: a particular drawer in the kitchen, the bottom of my closet, and a messy shelf in the garage. The arrival of spring has triggered a desire to finally address those areas and get rid of the junk! As I started listing physical items in my home that I need to donate or trash, I realized I might be able to do some “spring cleaning” in my marriage, too. If you’d like to join me, here are a few things I came up with!
Out with the old resentments
Sometimes, when my husband and I have arguments, I bring up something that offended me weeks or months ago to underscore a point I’m trying to make. It can be even worse if the time references are vague (“Just like all those other times!”) or hyperbolic (“You never remember to do that.”). I’m going to trash all those old resentments. I want to address new issues in and of themselves as they come at me while leaving all the old ones in the past.
Trash the secrets
I never want to have any secrets in my marriage, because secrets threaten the special intimacy I share with my husband. For some people, trashing secrets might mean being more transparent about the ways they are spending their time and money. For me, it will mean being more forthcoming with my emotions. When my husband has done something that offended me, sometimes I expect him to read my mind about it—and then I get even more irritated or offended when he can’t! I am told this is a fairly common issue between men and women. So if that’s you, too, let’s resolve to help our poor husbands out and just tell them straight out what’s bothering us before we spiral.
Say no to “unquality” time
Something about winter can pull my husband and me into a terrible pattern: sitting side by side on the couch, separately death-scrolling on our phones. We may technically be “together,” but this is far from quality time! As the world comes back to life this spring, I plan to spend more quality time with my husband: cuddling, chatting, laughing, and getting outside when we can!
Decluttering my house always reduces my stress and makes me feel like I have room to breathe again. I think this same phenomenon will prove true in my marriage as well. Likewise, I truly hope one or more of these suggestions is a blessing to your marriage. Happy spring cleaning!