I lost my faith when I was 20. I don’t think I have talked much about that in these homilies. It was the late ‘60s-early ‘70s: the time of the hippies and the Vietnam War. It was a time that gave a big push to the kind of confusion that seems to plague our world now. I was a good kid from a good Catholic family – but, frankly, naïve and impressionable. I got lost in the confusion of the 'blind leading the blind,' as they say.
All I went through during that time, has given me a sensitivity and an understanding of what many go through. It has also given me a great desire to help those seeking to find the Lord, who is longing for and looking for them.
Since my childhood I have always been a seeker: searching for meaning, for truth: for God. When I lost my faith, I went searching the religions of the world. I did eastern meditation practices intensely for years, still not satisfying those deep human longings: what does life mean? What is truth? Where do I belong? At the heart of the frenetic life that seems to drive our world now, these questions seem to fester like unhealed wounds.
Saint John the Evangelist, in his Gospel, relates a series of miracles that Jesus works that he calls "Signs." The first is the changing of water into wine at the Wedding at Cana, and the last is this miraculous catch and encounter with the Risen Christ.
These "Signs" that we are to see, to understand what they mean, and to believe!
Certainly the Apostles had seen the Risen Lord, but we see them on the lake, apparently still listless, not yet really "getting" what it all means.
This sign is for them. This sign is for us now: to see, to understand, to believe!
Three years before, when Jesus called Peter, James, and John, while He was in their fishing boat working a miraculous catch. Now, He is on the shore and they do not recognize Him at first. But they are in the boats and the miraculous catch is much greater still.
Returning to the shore, He awaits them, the intimate friend who feeds them and heals their hearts.
This last Sign in John’s Gospel points us to understand the meaning of everything!
The Risen Christ is indeed always present: in the Church, in us, still working a miraculous catch. We are to believe that, whatever may be happening, even appearing to be contrary!
I’d love to have time to tell you how He found me. I’d love to hear how He found each one of you!
But for now, as we celebrate Easter, let’s know that He wants us to tell our stories with our lives!
There are lots of big fish that He wants to catch through us!
All are to know that HE is our Way, our Truth, and our Life.
