Blessed Virgin Mary | prayer | rosary
I was introduced to the Blessed Mother almost thirty years ago before I became Catholic, while working at a psychiatric hospital as a mental health technician. My supervisor at the time had noticed that the demands of the stressful job were taking their toll on me and offered the “Hail Mary” prayer as a way to ease some of the tension in my life. “I am not trying to push anything on you,” she explained, “I just think you may find it soothing and relaxing.”
Having grown up Episcopalian, I had heard of the prayer, but never gave it any serious consideration. Nevertheless, given the state of my life at the time, I was happy to give it a try.
By her suggestion, I began to pray the Hail Mary, and I found it to be very much like she expected: a soothing and comforting balm to the tense and anxious drama of my twenties. It gave me an immediate connection to a spiritual maternity that had always been sorely lacking in my youth. More importantly, however, it set me on a new path toward the Church, and eventually to the priesthood, accompanied by a Mother who is so incredibly humble, yet amazingly powerful all at the same time.
The prayer itself has been a source of constant reflection, and every Rosary prayed is an opportunity to sit with the multiple mysteries that lie in the words themselves. My attention is so often drawn to Mary as “Full of Grace.” Such an incredible truth it is, that Our Mother is completely full of Grace itself. In contrast, I have always considered myself a beggar when it comes to grace, identifying readily with the woman in Matthew 15:27 who tells Jesus that “even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from the master’s table.” Every crumb is a treasure, to be sure, and quite often I feel like the little boy Oliver from the musical of the same name, who out of habitual hunger boldly dares to ask, “More please, sir!”
Yet Our Mother is full of grace. She even carries the title, among many, as our Mother of Grace. Though it fascinates me that she is so full while we often feel so empty, she has taught me through the years that the nature of God’s grace is that it cannot be quantified. Every grace is a singular act of God, who is infinite in His love and generosity. Every grace, then, no matter how small we may believe it to appear, has the capacity to affect our lives and the lives of those around us, in ways we cannot even imagine. For God, a crumb is the same as a feast, the difference lies simply in the faith with which we receive it.
Mary is full of grace because she is completely open to God’s will on his terms, trusting in total surrender. As she declares, her soul “magnifies the Lord.” Her being, and everything she does, point to her beloved Lord and allow His life and love to shine through her completely. Like all of us, she is a finite vessel of grace, but her complete openness allows God’s abundance to radically overshadow her lowliness.
I am in my fifties now, and with Mary’s help, I have learned through the years, that what I tend to feel as a poverty of grace is just my lowliness obscuring my vision. If I look at myself I feel poor, for on my own so I am. Yet if I reflect on the grace I have indeed been generously given, I find that I am not as lacking as I think. I begin to see the abundance. She has helped me to be patient with myself and to allow God to take the time I need to effect the changes in my soul that allow me to be open to Him on His terms. Surrender is slow, and mustard seeds take time to grow, but our Mother of Grace will always help us to rest in her loving care while our souls are being fed. Grace begets grace as long as it is indeed grace on which we stay focused.
Oh Mary, help us to stay focused on your Son, who is Grace itself. By His mercy, may we trust in Him completely, and so like you, may always magnify His life to others.
Copyright 2023 Father Randy Mattox
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